I have tried to envision it, arriving in Hong Kong meeting my son, the long flight home with a baby who has just been taken from the only arms He has ever known and thrown into ours in a sense, the airport party where im certain there will be friends and family, balloons, signs, and tons of hugs as our sweet Connor is finally home. Trust me I daydream about it often but lately I have been envisioning something different.....
Lately my thoughts are on life after the party so to speak. When he is home and comfortable, when therapy has began, and Jeremy and I are settling into our role as new parents. The hard part is I dont quite know what that looks like. I have rode on a plane, I have seen other families airport welcome homes parties the balloons, the signs, the tears, but life as a mommy I dont know what that looks like. Ok I have friends who are amazing parents so I know what their lives look like with their kids, but me as a mom, Jeremy as a dad, a family of three thats all completely unknown.
Whats therapy going to be like, will he cry, will it break my heart. Will he like taking a bath or will it be a fight every night?? Will I be too lenient?? Will I be too tough?? Will that natural instinct kick in that everyone talks about?? What if it doesnt?? What if I dont know what to do??
Jeremy and I married very young. We have grown up together in our marriage, its been just us for 7 years. Whats it going to be like to add our little man into the mix??
The truth is I feel like I have no answers and as a planner this makes me crazy. However, I know God will work all things out for our good.
Will it be tough, absolutely! Life is not always a cake walk. Therapy will be hard, chances are even if he tolerates it he wont really like it. It will be worth all the tears it brings to see him enhance and be able to do new things. Bathing is part of life and once we get into a routine He will realize its not worth a fight and he wont cry and hate them forever. If those mommy instincts should happen to not kick in I have countless friends and family there 24/7 for support. Our marriage will change its inevitable but we will put God first and always make each other a priority . We will survive the being stretched thin and the bumps along the rode as we jump on the parenthood train. As I envision our life after the party I see nothing but happiness, more joy than my heart can hold and love, Lots and lots of love.
Lately my thoughts are on life after the party so to speak. When he is home and comfortable, when therapy has began, and Jeremy and I are settling into our role as new parents. The hard part is I dont quite know what that looks like. I have rode on a plane, I have seen other families airport welcome homes parties the balloons, the signs, the tears, but life as a mommy I dont know what that looks like. Ok I have friends who are amazing parents so I know what their lives look like with their kids, but me as a mom, Jeremy as a dad, a family of three thats all completely unknown.
Whats therapy going to be like, will he cry, will it break my heart. Will he like taking a bath or will it be a fight every night?? Will I be too lenient?? Will I be too tough?? Will that natural instinct kick in that everyone talks about?? What if it doesnt?? What if I dont know what to do??
Jeremy and I married very young. We have grown up together in our marriage, its been just us for 7 years. Whats it going to be like to add our little man into the mix??
The truth is I feel like I have no answers and as a planner this makes me crazy. However, I know God will work all things out for our good.
Will it be tough, absolutely! Life is not always a cake walk. Therapy will be hard, chances are even if he tolerates it he wont really like it. It will be worth all the tears it brings to see him enhance and be able to do new things. Bathing is part of life and once we get into a routine He will realize its not worth a fight and he wont cry and hate them forever. If those mommy instincts should happen to not kick in I have countless friends and family there 24/7 for support. Our marriage will change its inevitable but we will put God first and always make each other a priority . We will survive the being stretched thin and the bumps along the rode as we jump on the parenthood train. As I envision our life after the party I see nothing but happiness, more joy than my heart can hold and love, Lots and lots of love.
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