With Mothers Day right around the corner I feel compelled to share a little of my journey to motherhood.
For 7 years I prayed for a baby. I was so discouraged and saddened. Most times my prayers were nothing more than sobs, but just like Hannah God knew my heart even when no words came. I begged God for a miracle. I was completely broken, crushed and defeated. My body wasnt doing the one thing It was suppose to do. I felt my body had failed me. It was devestating month after month. The heartache at times felt too much to bear. During those 7 years I went to a doctor who assured me that he could help me and Jeremy and I would be pregnant within the year, Ill skip some of the details since I know a few guys who might read this ( but feel free to ask and I can tell you more) I was prescribed a pill and went in over the next few months for bloodwork to ensure the pill was working, it was!!! So this could be it. Finally I was gonna get my hearts desire.
And thats when it happened. God spoke to me one day and said Do you trust me?? Stop taking the medication. I was shocked and confused. Lord you know I trust you, but this is working, this is our shot, and now your asking me to stop. And again I felt God speak Trust me, stop taking the medication. And so reluctantly I stopped the medication. I began to trust God and His plans for my life. I stopped praying to become pregnant, and my prayers became God give us a family if it be your will. And my heart began to change. I began to understand and even though I still had so many questions I knew God was placing a calling on my life, and Jeremy felt it too. Everywhere we turned it was as if God whispered Adoption. We couldnt escape it. We couldnt pretend or push it aside and so with terrified hearts we stepped forward and said here we are God lead the way.
And ya know what God never falls off His throne. He never ceases to amaze. His mercies are new everyday. Not only did he give us a child, but he took the very thing that broke our hearts to lead us to our son.
On the other side of the world in Hong Kong, China there was a boy in a orphanage and the workers prayed for him daily and when they prayed for his health and safety, they also whispered God send him a family. For three years they prayed, and at times they probably felt discouraged. At times they felt sad.
And God saw us crying out for a child, asking for a family. And He knew a way to answer everyones prayers. And He made it happen. The adoption was hard, but the love arrived instantly. It flew through me so freely the moment I laid eyes on this beautiful boy and all of a sudden hundreds of prayers were answered. And no one was alone anymore.
If my journey to motherhood could tell people anything I want it to be that God is always good. Even when our hearts are broken. Even when we feel devestated and dont understand we need to just trust Him and remember that He never falls off His throne. And in an instant He can answer hundreds of prayers and thats what he did for us.
*** I feel the need to say that I know everyones journey is different and I am in no way saying if you seek medical intervention that you are not trusting God. This is just how my journey played out. We all have different paths to motherhood and no ones journey is wrong of less important or special than the other.
For 7 years I prayed for a baby. I was so discouraged and saddened. Most times my prayers were nothing more than sobs, but just like Hannah God knew my heart even when no words came. I begged God for a miracle. I was completely broken, crushed and defeated. My body wasnt doing the one thing It was suppose to do. I felt my body had failed me. It was devestating month after month. The heartache at times felt too much to bear. During those 7 years I went to a doctor who assured me that he could help me and Jeremy and I would be pregnant within the year, Ill skip some of the details since I know a few guys who might read this ( but feel free to ask and I can tell you more) I was prescribed a pill and went in over the next few months for bloodwork to ensure the pill was working, it was!!! So this could be it. Finally I was gonna get my hearts desire.
And thats when it happened. God spoke to me one day and said Do you trust me?? Stop taking the medication. I was shocked and confused. Lord you know I trust you, but this is working, this is our shot, and now your asking me to stop. And again I felt God speak Trust me, stop taking the medication. And so reluctantly I stopped the medication. I began to trust God and His plans for my life. I stopped praying to become pregnant, and my prayers became God give us a family if it be your will. And my heart began to change. I began to understand and even though I still had so many questions I knew God was placing a calling on my life, and Jeremy felt it too. Everywhere we turned it was as if God whispered Adoption. We couldnt escape it. We couldnt pretend or push it aside and so with terrified hearts we stepped forward and said here we are God lead the way.
And ya know what God never falls off His throne. He never ceases to amaze. His mercies are new everyday. Not only did he give us a child, but he took the very thing that broke our hearts to lead us to our son.
On the other side of the world in Hong Kong, China there was a boy in a orphanage and the workers prayed for him daily and when they prayed for his health and safety, they also whispered God send him a family. For three years they prayed, and at times they probably felt discouraged. At times they felt sad.
And God saw us crying out for a child, asking for a family. And He knew a way to answer everyones prayers. And He made it happen. The adoption was hard, but the love arrived instantly. It flew through me so freely the moment I laid eyes on this beautiful boy and all of a sudden hundreds of prayers were answered. And no one was alone anymore.
If my journey to motherhood could tell people anything I want it to be that God is always good. Even when our hearts are broken. Even when we feel devestated and dont understand we need to just trust Him and remember that He never falls off His throne. And in an instant He can answer hundreds of prayers and thats what he did for us.
If you think I didnt get my miracle, your wrong.
*** I feel the need to say that I know everyones journey is different and I am in no way saying if you seek medical intervention that you are not trusting God. This is just how my journey played out. We all have different paths to motherhood and no ones journey is wrong of less important or special than the other.
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