Our Story is so Important.....

      Last week Connor, LaLa ( my mom), and myself were eating in a restaurant when it became apparent we were being watched. A older couple in a booth across from us watched and smiled at practically every move Connor made. It was one of those good days when he was giggling and being wildly cute. We got up to leave and the lady said "I dont wanna offend you but is he adopted??"  I wont lie sometimes this is immediately annoying, but because of her sweet voice and gentle body language my guard never went up. I said yes he is, while I brushed his hair out of his eyes. She smiled and said "Our James is adopted too. He's from Albania." I replied "Thats awesome! Connor is from Hong Kong", She smiled and said "yes." ( I often forget that most people have already filled in that gap. haha) She then said " James is 30 now. It goes by so quickly how old is he??" I told her " hes six today." Her husband said " Well Happy Birthday Buddy."   Connor was grinned at them at this point so I said tell them bye at which he ran over to their table and hugged them both. I left feeling pretty incredible, because they got it. They didnt need to know all the details to reach out and connect with me.  

  This interaction left me with a few thoughts. First off how awesome to know theres still nice folks in this world. Second, how often do I immediately put my guard up and feel annoyed when the person is more than likely well meaning and just curious, and Third and the biggest thing I took away from this encounter is our story is important. 

I dont mean  to sound high and mighty. Yall know thats not me at all. I dont want the spot light to be placed on us, or even on Connor. I want the spotlight to always fall on God. The creator of the Universe who put all things in motion, and by his divine intervention made us a family. Our story is only important because it shows His love and grace. It shows how he works all things out for our good if we trust Him and will let Him use us. 

I was driving today, listening to the radio and Connors babbles from the backseat when a song came on the radio that spoke deeply to me. Its called Confidence and its by Sanctus Real. ( I"ll link it below.) The first verse goes like this.

I’m not a warrior
I’m too afraid to lose
I feel unqualified for what you’re calling me to
But Lord with your strength
I’ve got no excuse
'Cause broken people are exactly who you use.

I cannot even explain how these words spoke to me. I know I share alot, like a whole lot, but our story is so important. Not because of us, were ordinary people. Nothing about  us is anything special, but God used us in a very special way.

I can vividly remember feeling unqualified. Name a excuse and I promise I tried to use it. You wanna talk about being afraid, I cannot even describe to you the fear i felt. Broken people, thats us to a T.  But God!!! God chose us to parent this beautiful boy. This innocent child who needed us.

Those first few weeks Connor called us both mama. To some thats odd, but really it makes perfect sense. Mama was whoever took care of him. Mama wasnt a specific person,because he wasnt aware it was suppose to be. But God! God picked me. God made me mama. Now im the only one he calls that name, he knows that mama is me, and just me.

That part of our story is important. Gods perfect plan shines so brightly through when I tell that part. Its important that its shared. 

Connor spent the beginnings of his life in foster care before being moved to the orphanage. Connor was given a farewell party before leaving the orphanage with us ( a tradition for all the children before going home.) We had the privilege of meeting Connors foster mother when she came to his farewell party. They made a circle with us at the front and asked if anyone had anything they wanted to say to us or connor. She stepped forward, she spoke no english and used a interpreter, but she didnt let that stop her. Her words are forever etched in my mind.  "When Connor was a baby, I looked in his eyes everyday I prayed for you to come. I prayed for him to have a mother and father to love him. I can tell you love him. And today my prayers are answered. You are the answer to our prayers for Connor."

I saw a different side for the first time when I heard her words. Because we prayed for so long for a child, all we saw was OUR prayers being answered. Connor was our answered prayer, but when she spoke and I looked at all the tear filled eyes and head nods surrounding me I realized to them WE were the answered prayer. 

I share all this to say If you feel God urging you to speak, do it. Dont make a excuse. Dont let your words coming out unclear stop you. Dont be afraid to speak to a stranger in a restaurant. Your story is important. It could shed a whole knew light on someones situation. Your words could change everything, it could be just what someone needs.  Dont let fear hold you back. Dont feel or  worry about being unqualified. Follow God. Never Forget Your Story is Important!

Click here to hear the song Confidence by Sanctus Real