Over the last few weeks God has really thrown your Momma a curve ball. Adoption has been on my mind heavily. All I ever wanted in life was to be a mother, and I always thought I would have biological children. I'm not sure why, but God has laid Adoption on my heart and is not allowing it to go away. No matter what excuse I put up! We could never afford it, We are about to move, We wont qualify because our income is too low. I know people will say we didnt try long enough, and We should wait for Gods timing. I'm not sure why, but I just feel like We are suppose to take this route. I am praying like crazy for direction,but God just keeps whispering adoption. So I know He knows best so that must be all I need to know at this point. I want you to know Sweetie it does not matter to Momma one bit. I will love you with all my heart either way biological or adopted. It doesnt matter where you came from or what you look like I will always consider you mine.
Another huge question is domestic or international. As much as I want a newborn ( easier to get a newborn domesticly) my heart leans more towards international. For those precious babies in orphanages. Are you in a orphanage right now baby? Are you waiting daily wondering if this will be the day your family shows up to take you home? My mind is spinning with questions and more questions. What I want you to know is your Mommas trusting God! He can fund this adoption, He can help us qualify. His timing is perfect!!! He knows who you are and where you are, and I trust Him!!!
I am praying and seeking his direction. I cannot wait until I hold you in my arms whether you are handed to me by my doctor, or whether I scope you up off a orphanage floor. I will love you unconditionally this is my promise I know I can keep because I love you already. I don't know how many more months or years I will have to wait, but I wait and not lose the faith because I know you will be worth every second. You will be worth every tear I have cried. I know you will make me smile and turn my pain into joy. You will be the answer to my prayer. Everytime I asked God to give your Daddy and I a family He had you in mind. He knew there would come a day when I would finally see the big picture and realize His plan for my life.
Your Momma is so excited about the future because you are my future!!!!
I love you so much,
Momma
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