This morning I got Connor all dressed up for a Prince and Princess Tea party. I LOVE dressing him up!! I cringe when people say they want a girl so they can dress her up, I mean if you need proof that you can dress little boys up too here it is....
I drove Connor to his Grammies ( he went to the party with her) and I looked back at him strapped safely in his carseat with his little suit and tie and I couldnt help but Praise God for this beautiful life he has given me. Cause I remember when I prayed for this. When I longed for a child to get ready. When I looked at my empty backseat and wished there was a carseat buckled in tightly. I remember wondering if I would ever own a carseat. I remember wondering If there would ever be a time I glanced back to see a beautiful little face riding along with me. I thanked God right there while tears of thankfulness filled my eyes. Its then my thoughts were interrupted by Connor and I realized even though his voice was spewing out only squeals and babbles he was attempting to sing along to a worship song on the radio. Again my heart overflowed cause He knows who deserves the praise!!
There was a time I thought I would miss out on this. A time when this didnt seem like a reality. A time when being a mama didnt seem in the cards for me BUT GOD in his infinite Grace and Wisdom sent me a miracle. Not in the way we expected, and yet in a incredibly beautiful and perfect way. Cause one of the awesome things about our God is a no from him still has His goodness written all over it.
And the time when my prayers came out nothing but babbles, much like Hannahs, is no more. Because now I hear babbles coming from the backseat. That backseat that now has a carseat buckled in tightly. A backseat I glance back into and am met with a beautiful little face. A face that doesnt look like the one I pictured, and yet its a face that makes me world go round. A face that makes me burst with pride, a face that gives me a love I didnt know existed. A face that lights up my days, A face that in a room full of people will always search for me, his mama. A face that is the answer to those prayers that only came out as sobs. A face I never knew I needed, and yet a face I cannot fathom living without. The face of my answered prayers. The face of my son.
And all at once I'm reminded of the days I prayed for what I have now. A life I dreamed about, and yet never envisioned quite like this. A life that is filled with the goodness and faithfulness of a almighty God.
Never believe that Gods no isnt for your good. Never believe that He doesnt have your best interest at heart. Trust Him. And I promise He will make your life overwhelmingly beautiful. And I cant promise you how long it will take, but I promise one day you'll look back and remember the days you prayed for what you have now.
For this child I have prayed and THE LORD has granted the desires of my heart. 1 Samuel 1:27
There was a time I thought I would miss out on this. A time when this didnt seem like a reality. A time when being a mama didnt seem in the cards for me BUT GOD in his infinite Grace and Wisdom sent me a miracle. Not in the way we expected, and yet in a incredibly beautiful and perfect way. Cause one of the awesome things about our God is a no from him still has His goodness written all over it.
And the time when my prayers came out nothing but babbles, much like Hannahs, is no more. Because now I hear babbles coming from the backseat. That backseat that now has a carseat buckled in tightly. A backseat I glance back into and am met with a beautiful little face. A face that doesnt look like the one I pictured, and yet its a face that makes me world go round. A face that makes me burst with pride, a face that gives me a love I didnt know existed. A face that lights up my days, A face that in a room full of people will always search for me, his mama. A face that is the answer to those prayers that only came out as sobs. A face I never knew I needed, and yet a face I cannot fathom living without. The face of my answered prayers. The face of my son.
And all at once I'm reminded of the days I prayed for what I have now. A life I dreamed about, and yet never envisioned quite like this. A life that is filled with the goodness and faithfulness of a almighty God.
Never believe that Gods no isnt for your good. Never believe that He doesnt have your best interest at heart. Trust Him. And I promise He will make your life overwhelmingly beautiful. And I cant promise you how long it will take, but I promise one day you'll look back and remember the days you prayed for what you have now.
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