Hey Guys!! Nothing new to report about the adoption, but I can tell you this Mamas heart is changing. So I'll just jump right into it. At first I worried and stressed over my childs diagnosis. In plain english I thought about Down Syndrome...ALOT. I stressed over his development and intellectual abilities. Not because I needed him to be what the world sees as "perfect", but just out of fear of what life will hold. What challenges we will face. However as I said earlier this Mamas heart is changing. I already LOVE my child. I really do. I pray for him daily and when I pray I ask God to make him the person He wants him to be. No matter what that looks like, no matter what challenges lie ahead. I no longer think about Down Syndrome much not because I want to hide his diagnosis, but because my son will be so much more. I think about challenges still, challenges of being a first time parent, of raising a son. I no longer live in wonder and fear. I prayed for God to take the fear away and God did. I am in awe of how God is changing me through this adoption journey. He has shown me how perfect his strength is when my strength is gone. At times He has carried me through this adoption, because I felt I couldnt walk another step. Now here we are with our adoption funded, and waiting to hear if the baby were pursuing is indeed our Connor. His bedroom is ready, His Photo book is made and ready for me to click buy, and this Mama has never been more ready to hear he is yours.
7 Years praying for a family
15 months on this adoption journey
and as crazy as this will sound now I get it,
all the months of disappointment and every negative pregnancy test , It all no longer matter.
Because what matter is Connor.
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