My "new norm"

     I am panicking!!! I know worrying is not going to help and I know its just making things harder on me, but I cant help it. I am agonizing over hearing if we were accepted or denied for the agency we applied through. My stomach is in knots and I cant concentrate on anything else. I know that this is Gods will and if its not this agency that He has one out there for us. I know that its ok either way because we have given this to God and asked Him to have his will. We have prayed continuously over this application. No matter where I am its on my mind, and then it hits me this will be my life until my baby is home in my arms. Worrying, agonizing, unable to concentrate it will all be the new norm for me. I know God is in control and I trust Him, but at the same time my baby is somewhere in this world, and i dont know if they are hungry, or sick, or cold, or scared. I dont know if they feel loved, or if they feel alone. Think about that and see if your mind doesnt start racing.
        As crazy as it is I pray daily for my child.  I ask God to provide enough food so they are not hungry, I ask Him to bless there caretaker in a special way for giving my child a good start. I ask Him to wrap His arms around there birth mother as she makes the hardest decision of her life. I ask Him to give her peace and help her to sense that someone is gonna love her baby so much, and try to give them a happy life.
     I know that God has a plan and if we will just take a deep breath, trust Him, and follow Him He will lead us to our firstborn. I dont know where or who they are, but He does.
   Please pray for us as we wait on a answer from the agency. Pray for us as we are getting different reactions from family and friends. Pray as we struggle to live life in our "new norm."  Pray for our whole adoption process. We appreciate your prayers and could never thank you enough for them!!!