He will finish the work He starts.....

I cant even find the words to write!! All I can say is God is FAITHFUL!!! And HE will finish the work He starts!!!!!  I  am also excited to say our dossier has been sent to our global branch in Michigan, but we are waiting on one paper before it can be sent to Hong Kong. Please pray that the paper is turned in soon so we can move on to this next extremely important step!!!

God is good!!!!!

I wish I could

   I wish I could explain to you just how faithful our God is

 I wish I could explain to you how humbling it to know that all the way across the World He chose a child just for you.

  I wish I could show you that He keeps His promises , even when there are times that He feels like He isnt or doesnt

 I wish their was some way to explain all the joy He has brought to my life

  Some way to tell you how good He is to those who put their trust in Him

 How His plans will blow your wildest dreams out of the water and even though His ways arent our ways in the end you realize their so much better than what we had planned.

 A way to put it all together and make you comprehend the goodness of our King even when things are not easy its all for our good.

  I wish I could tell you all these things but I just can't, There arent enough words to express his goodness, faithfulness, or plans for us.

 I wish I could tell you, but I just can't

If there's anybody here who's found Him faithful

Anybody here who knows He's able

Say Amen

If there's anybody here who's seen His power

Anybody here brought through the fire

Say Amen

Anybody here found joy in the middle of sorrow

Just Say AMEN!

200 Envelopes for Baby Malone

   We are starting a new fundraiser!! How it works is we take 200 envelopes and number them 1-200. We ask everyone to pick a envelope and the amount that is written on it is the amount you give to our adoption fund. We need everyone on board to make this fundraiser a success. If we get all envelopes given out and returned with the money we will raise 20K and our adoption will be fully funded!!!!!! Will you help us by simply picking a envelope???

Six words from the enemy

Does the enemy ever lie to you?? I know He does, but all to often we don't realize its a lie or that its from him. I have never shared this with anyone, but tonight I feel a strong tug on my heart strings to share something that the enemy made me believe.

      The enemy lied to me for a very long time and not until this weekend did I realize it. For years I listened to the lie and only now that I am aware of the lies he breathed into my heart do I realize that I have been robbed of so many blessing because of it. Its no secret that Jeremy has a desire to work with youth. He did so in Montana and He  recently (since being on day shift ) has really connected with our Youth group "The Way". I too have felt a urge to dig in and help with this ministry, but felt I couldn't all because of a lie that I now know came straight from the enemy. Even when I did attend the meetings  I felt out of place and like I didn't fit all because of a lie. So I kept my mouth shut even when given the opportunity to speak or share (even when alot of times I felt I should say something) I stayed quiet all  because of a lie I truly believed.

    Over New Years I went with Jeremy to help chaperone the youth at XtremeWinter. Xtreme Winter is a conference for youth. They have concerts, worship, and speakers. I had been before( with another church.) I cannot explain to you what all happen on this trip, but I will say that my heart changed and it was there that I saw the enemys lie come to light. It was there that I realized that I had fallen for something so untrue. It didn't happen during the concert,  while a speaker was speaking, or during alter call. It happened while I was surrounded by the girls of our church youth group. While we shared our darkest secrets. While we poured out things we hide from the world, thats when I knew that this thought that crossed my mind so many times was all a lie.


I am forever changed and I too want to pour my life into people just like me who are falling for these things because they don't realize its all a lie. I wasted so much time, but my prayer is that I wont waste a second longer. That because of my story others will too realize they have been lied to and they wont waste anymore time believing those lies that have held them back for so long.


The lie that I listened to, the lie that I heard everytime I felt a urge to attend a youth group meeting or felt the urge to become more involved was only six short words. Just six tiny words that kept me from saying and doing so many things. Six words that haunted me for so long.

They are six words that I no longer believe, they are six words that I will not allow to hold me back any longer, six words that I discovered this past weekend couldn't be farther from the truth.

"You can't connect with those girls".

   ----Six words from the enemy

News, News, and more News!

     Life is busy!!!! In one day we received three different pieces of news.  The first news I received was that I passed my medication administration class. That was amazing news and a HUGE relief!!!! The class was three days of tons of information and the test was intense. I am so thankful for everyone who prayed for me as I was testing.

    I was on a huge high, but the next news I got was not so great. I found out my sweet Nala needs surgery.

Nala had been limping on and off for a few months, but She never acted as if she were in any pain. Then a few days ago I noticed a rash on her inner thigh of the leg she holds up when she limps.  Off to the vet we went where we discovered that Nalas knee was out of socket. The vet put it back in place several times and each time it immediately popped right back out. So surgery is scheduled for January 16th. The rash was from where she had been licking the area because it hurt so bad, yet she never whined, yelped, or even let on that she was hurting ( besides limping). She is such a trooper and we know that she will pull through just fine.  Until then she is on pain pills and is super loopy!

So I felt drained. I had been very excited and then had that excitement shot down with sadness and dread. Then I opened the mailbox to find a letter form the US citizenship and immigration services,  it stated that we are approved to adopt!!!! This is amazing news and now we can send our paperwork to Hong Kong ( when we finish the paperwork!)  This was the most amazing news of all. This made me realized that everything is going to be ok because God is piecing everything together so perfectly.

Today Jeremy and I are heading to Gatlinburg. Four days with our fellowship family worshiping and hearing the word preached. We will see Rush of Fools, Colton Dixon, Switchfoot, Newsboys,  Matthew West, Mandisa, and many more. We are so excited and cant wait to see how God speaks to us on this trip. 

Please continue to pray for our adoption.  For paperwork, For doctor appointments, For identifying a child, For bringing Him home, and for Gods perfect timing in it all.

Bigger than us, but not bigger than Him.

 I know what your thinking when you see me posting asking for donations or kicking off yet again another fundraiser. Trust me I have heard it all, but the one I hear most often  is " If their going to adopt they should be able to pay for it".   Yep, I said "If their" because these comments aren't usually made to me, only about me.  If your one of those people who feels this way I have two things I want to share with you.
First let me say I wish we could. I wish more than anything that we could fund our adoption with no help. I know maybe it doesn't show, but I do not like asking for money. I feel as though im constantly begging for something and its not easy.

The second thing I wanna share with you is God called us to adopt. Its not something that we thought up one day. It took prayer, lots of prayer and seeking His plan. Sometimes God calls us to do things that are bigger than us. That's what He did when He called us to adopt. God knew it was bigger than us, He knew we couldn't fund it ourselves. Yet He called us anyway.Each time any amount has been due, God has provided it. I dont mean money fell from the sky like manna, but God used people like you. He laid it on folks heart to give and I am so thankful they listened to His still small voice like we did when we stepped out on this journey.


God called us to do something bigger than us, but im thankful that nothings bigger than our God.

Maybe He is calling you to give. Right now we have a tshirt fundraiser going on. Shirts are $15 and we need to sale 43 shirts and we only have 5 days to do it. We need friends, family, and anyone else to step up and make a difference for a orphan, for our son.  I know that this is bigger than us , but its not bigger than God.

Click on the link below to order.
.
https://www.bonfirefunds.com/bringing-home-connor-malone

Merry Christmas Connor

 Connor,

              I woke up this morning and my first thoughts were of you. What did you do this morning?? Where there presents for you?? Did someone scoop you up into their arms and whisper I love you?? I wish I could promise that next Christmas you will have presents and hugs, but I know I cant promise you that. I wish I could say that next Christmas You would wake up to me and your daddy and presents under the tree. The truth is I dont know what next Christmas holds for our family. My hope is that if you cant be home next Christmas, if thats just not in the cards for us I pray that were close. I pray that we will at least know who you are. I pray that we will be getting your room ready and anticipating the most exciting trip of our life.

Merry Christmas to our precious baby boy!!!  We cant wait to meet you!!!

          

Hand in Hand

        Have you every saw God work things out so perfectly in your life and felt everything was going hand in hand with the other? You felt as though you could literally see Him working all things out for your good like He promises He will in Romans 8:28.   That's how I have felt these last few months.

     Most of you all know that our child will have special needs. We won't know exactly what they are, until we are matched with our child. Everyone thinks we are saints for this and wants to praise us and say how they couldn't do it or tell us how awesome  and brave we are.  The truth is we aren't any of those things.  We are fearful, and nervous. We feel unprepared and alone. We worry that we dont have what it takes. As human we wonder why God has called us to this certain task when we feel so unqualified.  The old saying remains true....

   I saw a job in the paper on the very beginning of October. I went in and applied and got the job. I was excited for a new opportunity and to be honest the chance to better our family financially. I had no idea it would be one of those hand in hand moments.  My job has taught me a million things already in the short three months I have been there, and although I have millions more things to learn it has helped me feel more ready. It has helped me take a deep breath and whisper 2 Timothy 1:7 on those days when I feel scared and unqualified. On those days when I wonder if I have what it takes to parent a child with special needs.

  When I walked into Tri County Center on October 6th 2014 God smiled down knowing that He was working all things out for my good and knowing that I still had no idea yet.  He knew I would find out my strengths and weaknesses and He knew that my heart would change and I would grow into the woman He always knew I could be. The woman who would eventually be a mother to a child She never believed she could be a good mother too. God smiled because He knew I could.

***( I want to add that I work with adults not children but Connor will be a adult one day too and thats what I mean, This post was not meant to offend or upset anyone in anyway.)

I dont wanna miss a second. . . .

So I asked for everyone to pray for a unspoken a couple weeks ago. I know that so many covered me in prayers and sure enough just a few days later I got the amazing news. I would be switching to day shift. Most everyone knows Jeremy got put on day shift a few months ago. So to be on the same shift is an amazing blessing. Our schedules were so opposite that we did not see one another. Long story short the opportunity for days was at my fingertips but was not up to me, so I asked for prayers and as always God answered.


   With adoption you have to have a plan. Yep, We are still at least a year out from bringing our little man home ( we arent even matched with a little man yet) but still we have filled out tons of paperwork about our arrangements for him when we are working and what a typical day will be like for him. It is the strangest thing to type out step by step what my sons day will be like especially with so much unknown ahead, but you do what you gotta do and move forward. So with both of us working days we knew we would need a sitter ( I know what your thinking sure we are still so far away from bringing him home we will have plenty of time to plan and make arrangements for all that later. That is where the adoption twist comes in and where that statement is so wrong. We have to have a plan. We will need to give specific information about our child care arrangement. So I had not thought too much about it because I was still on a high from "OH MY IS THIS REALLY HAPPENING" when a friend of ours shared the news that she was looking to start babysitting. My heart literally skipped a beat. This Momma is gonna be picky I will go ahead and admit, not picky like no ones holding my son, but picky  as far as leaving him in someone elses care I will background check you, I will facebook stalk you, and I have probably already looked at your instagram photos. I mean seriously you can trust no one now a days. So when this literally happened within days of finding out I would be starting days soon I knew it was a good thing. I mean we all go to church together and I feel comfortable. Which is HUGE!! God literally worked out every single detail. I am just overwhelmed at how He loves and works out everything in my life.


One thing that I am so excited about is being home as a family at night. I know that some moms will say I wouldnt mind not being there for the bedtime tantrums, or the bedtime stories that never end, but how would you feel if five nights a week you werent there. You got home after your little one was sound asleep and you missed out on it all. Thats why days is so important. Thats why I am so overwhelmed. Ill take the tantrums, and ill read story after story until He falls asleep. I have already missed so much and once hes home I wanna be the one tucking him in and snuggling up for nighttime cuddles after a long day. I cannot wait to come up with our own bedtime rituals, and I dont wanna miss a second.

Sweet Molly

      When we lived in Montana we rescued a dog from the animal shelter named Molly. She was the sweetest dog. She was gentle and yet very playful. What I loved the absolute most was her love for kids.

 Or maybe She just tolerated them

Regardless I never had to worry because  She was so sweet.

For almost two years Molly was my shadow. She was my girl. I remember sitting with her and crying because I missed my family or just had a bad day and she would snuggle up a little closer to me as if to say its all gonna be ok.

 She was always there up for whatever and life was never dull or boring with her around.

Our plan was to take her with us to Tennessee, but in  the end that didnt quite work out the way we had planned. We ended up giving her to our friends Big J and Cameron Downing. Which was a absolutely perfect home for her since they have 5 kids.

 She hadnt lived with them but a few weeks when  we went over and the kids had already taught Molly to roll over. My heart was sure that we had done the right thing although it was hard I know she was meant to be with them.

I visited in February (2014) and Molly was doing awesome it was so good to see her so happy and full of life.


We received a phone call today that Molly had passed away. Such a sad feeling came over us. Our hearts are broken for the Downing Family. We are hurting for them, for the kids, but we are also mourning the loss of a special someone who was once our shadow, who was once our girl, who was once our dog.  Tonight our hearts are heavy as we remember what a special dog she was. We will never forget our time with sweet Molly.

Needing your prayers

 Hey guys I have a huge prayer request. We will be starting on our Dossier (is a collection of documents that represent your family to the adoption authorities in country)  soon. We need this covered in prayer. I know that this seems like no big deal, but trust me its tough. Everything must be perfect and match perfectly.  As far as financial paperwork all the way down to how we sign our name. Its so crucial that we send these documents right the first time to prevent any time delays and hold ups. Our instinct is to hurry up and finish and although we ask you please pray we can finish in a timely fashion, we also ask that you pray we would take a deep breath and relax and take our time. This is the last HUGE step in our process, This paperwork is how they match you with your child. It will be some of the most important paperwork of our life. Please pray and lift it up in your prayers daily. Also pray for funding.

Thank you for your continued support.

We didnt choose them.....God did.

     When we received our home study packet and let me assure you it was a PACKET!!! I faced it head on. Most of the basic info paperwork I flew through, but when I got to this piece of paper my heart sank.  Legal Guardians.  I know what your thinking whats to think about , right? Either my parents or his parents. After prayer and discussion we didnt feel either was the right decision. Nothing against them or the way either of us were parented. We both had great childhoods and have wonderful parents, but we both knew they were not a fit for legal guardianship of our son. However we had no idea who was a fit. We prayed and prayed and I cried . . . .alot. Its the strangest thing to make plans for where your  baby would end up should something happen to you and your husband. Especially when you have never raised him yourself  and yet your suppose to pick who would raise him should you be gone. We decided to save that until last and in the meantime moved on to other paperwork. Finally the day came that we were almost done with everything else and we could no longer put this off. We prayed and still didnt feel we had any answers. Finally one night I begged God to show me who was a fit? Who could love our son and raise him? Who would treat him like their very own? Who would allow our families to still play a huge part in his life?

         I woke up one morning and I knew. I had a couple that literally just popped into my head ( not really I know that God put them there). I was in the kitchen and I said Jeremiah and Carrie. Jeremy looked at me like I was crazy and after a few moments of silence I said Legal Guardians?? Jeremy immediately said Yes!! Why did we not think of them before?!  

 I mean they were perfect. They love God, they love each other,  they love their baby, they love kids. They are active in their church. They would let our families see our son whenever.

So we dropped the bombshell on them and asked them to pray about it.
We prayed, they prayed, and God answered.

Even though they know our son will have special needs, and even though they have one son already and plan to have a big family in the future. They said yes.

From the day we announced our plan top adopt. Carrie was there cheering us on. She was so excited. Even when everyone else either acted like we were crazy or like they didnt believe us , she was what got me through. Her excitement and encouragement helped me more than I could ever say.  And although I dont wanna think about anyone else being my Babys Mama , Im ok thinking about it as long as its her.

I pray that they never have to step up and raise our son. I pray that we are always around to love and raise him ourselves, but I have peace in knowing that if im not here He will be ok. Because we didnt pick his God Parents.....God did.

Connors God parents :) and God Brother Oliver 

Im pretty sure they already love my baby  :)

Revealing my Sons name :)

      For 6 months Jeremy and I kept a secret. Something just the two of us shared. The name we had chosen for our first son. For months we called him Baby C.  Finally the waiting was over and it was time to reveal the name we had fallen in love with, but first we told our family.

My parents finding out Baby Cs name

Baby Cs God parents finding out Baby Cs name

Jeremys parents finding out Baby Cs name

Uncle Joe and Aunt Tiff finding out Baby  Cs name

 Next  we let you guess and everyone had some good guesses and a few of you were right :)

Christian
Caleb
Caden
Carter
Chase
Cullen
Casey
Canyon
Cameron
Christopher
Calvin
Collin
Carson
Colton
Canaan
Carty
Cletus
Ceasar
Corbin
Clay
Charles
Connor

Our Sons name will be Connor!!!!

A life changing sentence

    On November 7th we received a life changing letter. With that first sentence my world changed.....

 Were approved!!! Meaning this is really happening. I know it was always happening and I realized that but this means its officially happening. We are moving onto paperwork that actually goes to Hong Kong and helps them match us with our son. It doesn't get more real or life changing than that. 

Another reason this approval letter is so bitter sweet is we waited 4 long months with no word and no news. Here is a look into our home study.

• April 17, 2014 Received our home study packet ( tons of paperwork)
•  April 28, 2014 Couples interview (answered tons of questions about us, why we chose adoption, our marriage, our home life, etc.) We also turned in  most of our paperwork.
• May 12, 2014 individual interviews ( answered tons of questions about our childhood, about each other, our marriage, etc.)
• June 3 and 4 2014 Doctor appointments ( Physicals for home study)
• July 10, 2014 Home visit ( social worker comes to our house checks to see that there is a room that will be for baby, checks that all medicine, cleaning supplies, sharp objects and guns are locked away out of reach, observes neighborhood,ask about schools, hospitals, etc.)
• November 7, 2014 received our letter that home study is approved!!!

God has carried us  the whole way and He has blessed us beyond belief!! We are so excited to be one step closer.

$10 challenge

  We are kicking off a new fundraiser through the month of November. We are asking that friends and family donate $10 then spread the word to your friends and family and have them do the same. We are praying that God would allow this to take off like a wild fire and grow into something so much bigger than us. We know that this is a huge opportunity to bring in funds. I know everyone cant give and we completely understand but for those that can spare $10 we ask that you please do so in order to help us bring our son home.

You can send donations to our paypal account at jeremymalone@gmail.com or you can mail donations to our mailing address 108 N Clark Street Sweetwater tn 37874

Please pray for the funding of our adoption and if you can please join us in our $10 challenge.

What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? Romans 8:31

My world crumbled but God saw the bigger picture and a more beautiful plan

      When  Jeremy and I married (6 1/2 years ago!) we both knew we wanted children. We had talked about it numerous times throughout our relationship and we knew it was something we both wanted.
 It wasn't long after being married that we stopped trying to prevent a baby ( TMI I know im sorry). Still the months went by and then years and no baby. So at one of my yearly appointments I expressed to the doctor my concerns and He ran some test. Turns out I have PCOS  (Polycystic Ovary Syndrome) Polycystic ovary syndrome is a condition in which a woman has an imbalance of a female sex hormones. This may lead to menstrual cycle changes, cysts in the ovaries, trouble getting pregnant, and other health changes. In my case My sugar stays too high and my body does not always ovulate. My doctor prescribed pills to make my body ovulate and assured me he could help us to be pregnant within the year. I was happy to have a diagnosis with a solution, but it broke my heart knowing my body was not working the way it was suppose to. I spent sometime being mad at God, I spent sometime asking why, and to be honest I spent far too much time feeling sorry for myself. 
     I cant explain why, but I finally snapped out of it. I no longer was mad and I no longer felt sorry for myself. I was so convicted that In Gods time He would give us a child that I stopped taking the pills. I told Jeremy that when God decided it was our time we wouldn't need a pill or some doctor making promises. 
Years went by and although I didnt get pregnant I was fine with that because I knew my God had a plan and He was enough. During this time we moved to Montana and we were so busy and happy serving and loving on others children and babies, but still we both longed for a family of our own. 
    Then we announced that God was calling us home and I think lots of friends and family thought we were moving home to start a family. We were fine with that plan if it was Gods plan but that was not on our minds when we moved home. I spent alot of dark times when we first moved home. I couldnt find my purpose, I couldnt see Gods plan.  About 6 months later God revealed his plan. We dont always know why things happen the way they do, we dont always understand his plan in the beginning but He wants to see if we will trust Him and step out in faith without seeing the whole picture.  
     Turns out about 7 months later we realized He did call us home to start a family. Not flesh of my flesh Nor bone of my bone But still miraculously my own. I have no doubt that this is why the holy spirit convicted me about taking the pills, not that God would have allowed us to get pregnant if that wasnt His plan, but He wanted to see if we would put our  trust  in Him and His timing. He wanted us to hold onto His promises and not a doctors. 
 Sometimes its hard to see the big picture, sometimes its hard to wait on His timing, but its always worth it when we do. The waiting makes us grow stronger and it makes the gift so much more worth it when we have longed, prayed, and waited for so long. This is my story, this is How God brought beauty from ashes in my life. With one diagnosis I felt my dreams crashing down , but God saw the bigger picture and He knew that beauty was just around the corner. 

Capturing the joy, love, and excitement we feel

          As a person who loves pictures I browsed pinterest and anywhere else to get adoption photo ideas. I knew I wanted photos to remember the joy and love we felt long before we knew our child. After all I dont know many pregnant woman who dont do belly photos or some sort of maternity shoot and just because im not pregnant im still a mother to be and I was not gonna miss out on the photos. The problem was I wanted professional photos without the price. We just couldnt spend money on something technically we could do ourselves not when we were fundraising for the adoption itsself. I was sad because I knew if we had to take our pictures ourselves the quality wouldnt be all that great ( theres only so much you can do with a timer and a tripod)

      Sometimes when we pray God answers with people we see everyday.  Thats what He did for us anyway.

 Ivy is not just our  pastors daughter, Ivy is not just our drummer at TFC,  Ivy is so much more than that because first and most importantly Ivy is our friend. When I asked Ivy if she would do a photo shoot for us I told her I didnt need a answer right away that she could think about it and let me know. She immediately said she would do it.  She did amazing!! I got every shot I wanted and more that I hadnt even thought of. I know that She was the answer  to my prayer. I am so thankful for her  and her servants heart.

   These photos capture the joy, love, and excitement we feel about our prayers for a child being answered after 6 long years. I am thankful God answers on His time and in His way.  Enjoy.....